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Marshall versus the Machines

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Marshall versus the Machines


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Marshall versus the Machines is a folk song played during Subway Wars, Bedtime Stories and Bass Player Wanted. Marshall, who feels his body has been letting him down, decides to prove himself better than the machines (subway, taxi, bus, etc.) by racing the gang downtown. As he runs, Marshall versus the Machines plays.

"I'll show them. My body can outrun any motorized vehicle. I'm like John Henry when he beat the steam engine. All I need is a great folk song.."


Subway WarsEdit

Gather round, ye children
To hear the tale so sweet
Of a man who dared to race machines
With nothing but his feet

With hair of auburn beauty
A hero dressed in jeans
He's fighting for America

Versus the machines...


As Marshall ran with all his might
And passed his friend, Christine
He thought of all the times that he had
Beaten the machine:

He triumphed over Pitfall
He vanquished the alarm
He brought the jukebox back to life
With his Fonzarelli arm

Versus the machines...

Move along! Yah!
Move along! Yah!

Our hero's strength was fading fast
Just as the light turnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn.....ed green
He then thought back to all the times
He'd lost to a machine:

The cable box's fearsome bite
The stapler's mighty sting
The cable box's bite again

Getting too tired
To sing...


Bass Player WantedEdit

How I Met Your Mother - Marshall vs01:11

How I Met Your Mother - Marshall vs. The Machines

Version from Bass Player Wanted

Versus the machines.

Our hero starts his journey
With steely eyed resolve
But let's skip ahead to later
With a slow dissolve ...

So tired, dehydrated
Not making any sense
But wait a second,
Why is Bigfoot standing by that fence?

I'm not hallucinating
Bigfoot really exists
But everyone knows he quit smoking years ago

Oh, crap. I'm losing it.

Notes and TriviaEdit

  • A Provo, UT indie band is named Marshall vs. The Machine in reference to this song.
  • The Song sounds like Vaughn Monroe's "Ghost Riders in the Sky" from 1949.
  • A portion of the songs is heard at the end of Bedtime Stories.

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