East 84st Street and 3rd Avenue
Manhattan, New York
Depending on the view out of the window, the apartment address must be: 211 Madison Avenue (btw 35th & 36th)
Barney's Apartment is the apartment where Barney lives. It is also known as the Fortress of Barnitude and The Heart of Bachelor Country.
It is a two bedroom apartment, one occupied by Barney himself and the other occupied by his suits, which are Barney's family. Barney owns two 300 inch flat screen televisions that were installed to the walls of his living room and bedroom.
In the bedroom, there is a king-sized bed, full-size blanket, and one pillow. Also, the Lion's Head stonework from the Arcadian is bolted above Barney's bed. In the bathroom, there is only one towel, no hair dryer, and a toilet seat that unless applied continuous pressure will not stay down. In the hallway there is a large display of Barney's porn that is professionally lit. In the living room is a life sized "Stormtrooper" (formerly a Clone Trooper) that is actually not placed there in order to drive away women but is rather "just awesome". The kitchen doesn't have a real oven, but an oven made of cardboard. This apartment is designed by Barney Stinson to be a place that when a girl wakes up the apartment will tell her to leave. Barney also possesses a katana which is displayed next to his couch.
In The Broath, Barney's girlfriend Quinn moves in with him. In Trilogy Time, although Quinn has sold all of her stuff because Barney wants his apartment as it is, she wants to use her own coffee mugs instead of his, which Barney doesn't approve of. He tells her that he has to assert his dominance as a man in his apartment, which results in a fight between them.
In The Fortress, Robin refuses to live in Barney's apartment after the wedding and asks him to sell the place. When Barney shows reluctance of doing so, she holds an open house without his consent. Barney tries to scare away the prospective buyers by showing them the features which he used on his one night stands, but to his surprise, a couple tells them that they will buy the place. However, when the couple informs Robin that they plan on demolishing the place, she yells at them to leave.
- Barney Stinson (owner)
- Quinn Garvey (former fiance)
- Lily Aldrin (former roommate; temporarily)
- Robin Scherbatsky (former spouse)
- Ellie Stinson (Daughter; assumed)
There are a number of unusual features in the apartment, most of which are for Barney's one-night stands.
- 300-inch plasma-screen TVs - The apartment has two very large and bright televisions, one in the living room and one in the bedroom. Barney says that "they only sell them in Japan, but I know a guy. Had to ship it over in a tugboat "like freakin' King Kong".
- The 'Jor-El' Cam - The camera in his closet records and projects an image of whoever is talking to it, amplifying and echoing the voice as well. Ted describes it as resembling the projection of Jor-El's head in Superman's Fortress of Solitude.
- Ho-be-gone System - The bed in the bedroom is on tracks and can be slid to get rid of any girl who wants to spend the night. The current bed goes to a compartment in the wall, along with the girl, and is replaced by a new bed. Although Barney claims credit for the system ("By Stinson. Patent pending"), when Robin asks what happens to the "hos" Barney scoffs, "What am I, a contractor?"
- Heavy, Set, Go - A body-fat scale hid under the welcome mat to check if the girl who enters the apartment is not overweight.
- The Room With A Screw - The view from the balcony can be customized to Paris, Venice, Niagara falls, African Safari, and an explosion site.
- Escape from Bitch Mountain - A chute in the kitchen that lands in the alley to escape from a girl who doesn't want to leave.
- Voice-activated smoke detectors - Smoke detectors that activated by certain phrases such as "I want a deeper commitment", "I'm a week late", "I'm too tired", "Let's snuggle", and "We have a child together." Phrases like "Barney, I'm getting wet" turn them off.
- Camera surveillance system - The apartment has many hidden cameras so Barney can monitor his apartment and record all of his one-night stands. One of the cameras zooms in on the loudest person in the room.
- Headboard with lube dispenser - Removed after Barney is engaged to Robin (Ring Up).