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Barney's Blog: Ridonkulous

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This is the one hundred and eighty-first entry of Barney's Blog, written by How I Met Your Mother main character Barney Stinson. It was retrieved from Barney's Blog at the CBS website here.

This entry is in response to the episode Romeward Bound.

RIDONKULOUSEdit

April 15, 2013


RIDONKULOUS
This week my friend Ted used the word “ridonkulous” to describe the body of a potential hottie in the bar, thereby driving the final nail into that word’s coffin. Thank God. You see, words like “ridonkulous” cheapen the English language and, more importantly, make one sound like a complete wad… even if that chick’s body was totally off the chain and despite chillin’ with my shorty I had to get my scope on. I mean, YOLO, amirite? What up!

To help hasten the demise of “ridonkulous” and other goofy words and phrases, I have selflessly generated a “no-say” list. From this day hence, anyone heard uttering the following words shall be promptly kicked in the nuts*… even if it’s a chick.

OFFICIALLY PLAYED-OUT WORDS
crushed it
ridonkulous
off the chain
…said no one, ever.
touché
awkward!
Up in herrrrr
that moment when…
first world problems”
(I’m sorry, but I don’t like my problems to be minimized. When your tailor suddenly closes early because of a “family emergency” that is nothing short of a tragedy.)
amazeballs
totes / totes jelly
EPIC FAIL
literally
(Exception: my boy Joe Biden! He cray cray!)
my boy
cray cray
game changer
sick
(as in “that’s sick”) [sic.]
OMG
awesomesauce
the 99%
(Hey, maybe if you worked a little harder you wouldn’t be stuck with everyone else. Just a thought.) Instagraming a picture of what you are about to eat with the caption “nom nom”
so this is happening…
whatevs

* I reserve the right to say any of these phrases without fear of any scrotal-based retribution. Why? Because I made up the rule, son!

Notes and TriviaEdit

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Uncle Barney's Mail Sack
Ridonkulous
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The Bro-Mitzvah

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